Adjusting (and enjoying)!!

Ok, so I guess I'm adjusting, because I found myself really enjoying my Monday night alone tonight. I came home, cranked up my "chill" playlist on my ipod, hopped in a hot bath and relaxed. Afterwards, I cooked what I wanted for dinner. Oddly enough, a grilled cheese and a turkey hot dog (no bun) tingled my taste buds. Yeah, not many people would enjoy eating this meal with me--so that's why I need an occasional dinner alone!

I'm reading Karol Ladd's book, The Power of a Positive Wife, and I guess it's got me thinking positively about being a coach's wife, too. Other fun things about being a coach's wife:

• Lot's of school t-shirts to sleep in
• Power of the remote control (TLC and Lifetime here I come!)
• Guilt-free time to blog, workout, nap, etc.
• Missing my husband and being excited to see him when he gets home
• Getting to watch my husband work on Friday nights
• Outings with the other coaches' wives
• Free tickets to games
• Never worrying about Friday night plans

Whatever career your husband is in, he needs your encouragement, support, and love.

Late nights? Enjoy your nights alone--use that time to find your passions; when you have your own passions, you'll be more supportive of his.

Hubby comes home stressed? Tell him how proud you are of him and how thankful you are for all he does to support you and your family. Order dinner in and take a night to relax with him. Instead of nagging him for wanting to relax, join him. Who knows what a little TLC might do for your marriage ;)

Too much time together? I know some women have the opposite problem of me. Their husband either works from home or doesn't work many hours. (This can be summer or holidays for coach's wives) If that's the case, pray for sanity. Just kidding! Give each other space, so that you have something to share when you come back together. Plan lunch dates or an afternoon stroll (or whatever it is you call it..wink), then go your separate ways until then. If you set a time to meet, neither of you will be tempted to interrupt the other and you just might look forward to seeing each other.

What are some ways that you've encouraged your man? How are you turning a potential negative into a positive? Any other thoughts for dinner for one?

So speak encouraging words to one another. Build up hope so you'll all be together in this, no one left out, no one left behind. I know you're already doing this; just keep on doing it.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (The Message)

The Mack of All Daddies

It's not often that we actually get to meet our heroes, but yesterday Jared got his chance. He met head coach of UT Austin's football team, Mack Brown.

Not only was Mack incredibly nice about taking pictures, but he spent 10 minutes talking to Jared and a couple other coaches on Jared's team.

I'm thankful that Jared and I have role models like Mack and his wife Sally to look up to as we're starting our journey.

This article about Sally is an encouragement to me as a wife of a coach.

Summer Fun to Football Widow--transition is hard

After a week of late night meetings, my coaching husband left this morning to attend four days of the Texas High School Coaches Association convention. This time of year is the hardest. During the summer, I see him every night, he pitches in with housework (I work full-time, by the way), and his attention is generally on me.

Around mid-July things start to change...I become a football widow.

It starts with meetings during the evenings, then the Saturdays get devoured, too, then he's gone for the annual convention. It doesn't end there! Upon return, he'll start two-a-days which result in his pure exhaustion. By the time I see him, he's hardly got energy to eat, let alone put a dish in the dishwasher. Although, he seems to muster up enough energy for a couple of things ;)

Although he'll pretty much stay this busy until the season ends, it gets easier. The transition is just so hard. I miss him, I miss splitting household chores, I miss eating lunch with him, I miss vegging on the couch with him, I miss his focus being on me. Yet, I believe with all my heart that he is called by God to minister to young men through coaching.

How do I handle this transition? Well, currently I'm handling it with my knee-jerk reaction--pull away and disconnect from him. In my immaturity and selfishness, I choose to protect myself from feeling rejected, left aside, and lonely, by doing the old "I'll leave you before you leave me" trick. I'll let you in on a little secret, though. It doesn't feel any better.

How would I like to handle this transition? I'd love to be more honest with my coach. To tell him how much I miss him and how happy I am to see him in our few moments together. I'd love to be independent, yet still need him. It's hard for me to find the right balance between independence and dependence, and to adjust the balance depending on the season. I'm a fortunate coach's wife--he really tries hard to show me he loves me and he really does miss me. I also want to work on looking to the Lord to fill my needs--Jared really isn't responsible to fill me emotionally or spiritually, and no one can live up to that pressure.

Instead of turning away from Jared, I will run towards Jesus. He can protect me, love me, sustain me, nourish me, romance me, and even humor me.

In addition, during the times I would have spent with Jared, I'm seeking things that will give me purpose and growth. Today, I went to a christian writer's conference hosted by Roaring Lambs and met so many wonderful women that God has used to touch other people. It encouraged me to post a couple blogs--progress, eh! Then, I made plans to attend mentor training at The Village Church to mentor an at-risk child for an hour per week. Hopefully more on these topics later.

Gotta go to bed now. I'm tired enough that I think I can fall asleep without my snuggle buddy.

Why Jared's not allowed on ladders anymore

May 29 marked the one-year anniversary of Jared's emphamous "fall." Last summer, on his first day of his summer job, Jared fell off a 6-foot ladder onto a flagstone patio, resulting in a brain injury. My dad, his new summer boss, had to call to tell me my fiance was in ICU, and I needed to get to Baylor quick. When I got to the hospital, I curled up in my daddy's lap for the first time since I was a child and cried with him. It was one of those moments that I hope I never forget, yet I don't want to remember often. One of my favorite images is me curled up in our Father, Lord's, lap, and that is how God allowed my earthly father to comfort me.

I remember the sermon from the Sunday before; Matt Chandler at The Village Church asked us what we had our fists around. The concept was that we all bargain with God--you can have this, this, and this, but not 'fill in the blank.' After the sermon, I wasn't sure what my so-called bargain with God was, but as I laid in the quiet waiting room that night, I opened my palm up to God and said, "Jared is what I've been clenching my fist around, but he's in Your hands." I realized I could refuse to let Jared go, but ultimately God is in control of it all. On my knees in the hospital waiting room, I opened my palm towards the ceiling and let go. I still prayed for Jared's healing, but I didn't make deals or tell God I would do this if he would do that...you know how it goes. Helpless, I had crawled in my daddy's lap, and helpless I had laid my burdens in my Father's lap.

Well, as you've seen from my previous post, a month later we were married! Although his injuries were very serious, he miraculously had a FULL recovery. The only thing that remains is a little bump where a rib he broke didn't heal quite right. I'm sure he's not a fan of the bump, but I'm glad it's there. When I see it, I'm reminded of how gracious God was to spare his life and how precious he is to me.

We just celebrated our one year anniversary at the beach where we had our wedding! It's been a wonderful year, as far as first years go. I'm not asking for anymore of these biggie moments, but I do pray that the Lord continues to use our experiences to better his Kingdom.

Thank You Lord for the Rain

Psalm 24: 1-2 The earth is the Lord's and everything in it, the world, all who live in it; for he founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters.

July 1, 2007, marked the first day of our lives together. It was amazing. Our wedding day was a foreshadowing of what much of our life will likely be like--chaotic and not according to our plans.

It rained on us all day and we thought it would never let up. We pleaded with God, "please stop the rain! " About 30 minutes before the wedding, the skies cleared and the sun came out. We couldn't have made the beach more beautiful if we had worked on it all day ourselves. The sand had been smoothed and cooled so not to scorch our feet, the sky had a perfect mix of sun and clouds, the water was still. While we were pleading with God to stop, he was preparing our ceremony site!

As my dad walked me down the isle (the boardwalk), I looked out at the place God had prepared for us and thought "how much greater is the place he's preparing for our eternal lives!" To top it all off, during the ceremony, I looked out to the ocean and dolphins were smimming back-and-forth right in front of the ceremony. My family swears they were angels. Then, as you can see in the picture above, God laid the sun to rest in a way that makes me wonder how anyone can deny our creator's existance.

Next time you're pleading for God to stop the rain in your life, consider what he might be preparing for you, and thank Him that he knows better than we do.